So this is not a victory post (even though I claim it as one) but myself and @vacuumebox just had the single most ridiculous duos game ever.
We drop in Yas, north-east apartments. Halfway down we're told that we were meant to be waiting for BloodLust (I believe that was the name, sorry but I wasn't familiar with you!) and because of this, we pledged to do a kamikaze run and rush the guys in Western Yas. Long story short, they weren't there and we grabbed a Dacia and headed south to the circle, all the time just arguing about what colour the Dacia actually was. Arriving close the Eastern bridge, the Dacia suddenly decided it need to return to its people and leapt majestically into the air. After the blue zone and the triple car flip, we were left at about 2% health and next to a firefight.
After healing up a fraction, I snuck up to within about 8 feet of a guy hiding behind a car who was under fire from the opposite side. I fire a Kar98k from that range and miss because it's me. Guy doesn't even turn. I down him next shot and sorta stand there for a moment wondering how it happened.
The obvious progression was there to take our Dacia of undetermined colour and charge it straight through a firefight and off a huge cliff into the Military Island waters. We swim across the entire gap to get into the zone, then grab a boat and swing around to the cliffs on the western side. Got into a boat-to-boat fight, outran them, got to a cliff and scaled it (despite Vacuum's insistence that it couldn't be done). Just as we reach the top, the team we fought before pulls up to the opposite cliff. Then begins an epic firefight on an open cliff face where we won and I ended up getting revived and nearly falling off a cliff.
Then the witchcraft starts. Surrounded by much more heavily armed teams we literally beeline to the circle, stopping to pick off one unfortunate guy behind a tree. I get hit twice, down to 10% health, then start zig-zagging while yelling SERPENTINE SERPENTINE SERPENTINE over and over, which naturally reroutes all the incoming bullets past me. After a little fight with unfortunate man's partner, I get revived for the 3rd or so time. The next rush to the circle claims Vacuum's life, because he didn't shout SERPENTINE enough. I did, a lot, and I made it to the wall next to a house. Last 5 alive.
At this point I just assumed I'm blessed with eternal life. I throw a grenade into the house, knock one down and rush the other with a UMP and kill both. Finally, trying to get to the last circle, the last team of two pick me off.
From all of that, and on a kamikaze run, we finished 2nd.